So it's been a while since I posted anything on here, mainly because I haven't had anything to rant about. Let's see if we can change that, shall we?
So here I am day 20ish into a 30 day juice fast. I say "ish" because I have had a couple cheat days. The first one I have already documented. The second was on day 13 and spilled over into day 14. My wife and I had decided we wanted to cook something last weekend, so we went to the store and bought our weekly juice items. This time around, however, we also bought healthy things to grill and chew. That consisted of pre-made stuffed mushrooms, some boneless chicken thighs, and a bunch of vegetables to roast. We bought a small portion and figured that it would feed us plenty. We were mistaken in our appetites. After eating the half dozen stuffed mushrooms, we barely had room for half of the chicken and vegetables that we had prepared. Luckily for me, I enjoy leftovers.
The third cheat day was the 4th of July. We went to a party and, although we brought juice with us, I wasn't content to simply stare at the food. My wife was picky about what she allowed herself, and ate sparingly. I, on the other hand, did not. I had quite a few nacho chips with some pretty fantastic dips. Had a few pretzel sticks with hummus, and had grilled chicken kebobs. That food would have been considered an appetizer before the juice fast, so I am fairly thankful that I am doing this diet thing, if only for the fact that I can now eat less before feeling like I am about to burst.
Normally I would break down my experiences here by day, but I really can't be bothered with all of that tonight. Not to mention the fact that it would consist mostly of me saying, "Day X: a whole lot of fuck all happened."
Week 2:
People at work have started to get used to me doing the whole juice fast thing and have stopped offering me food. That's a huge bonus right there, since now I am less likely to throttle them for offering me a piece of pizza. My coworkers are being slightly more interested in the concoctions I bring in, mostly because the juice tends to look disgusting, and no matter how much I tell them that I have included enough fruit to make it palatable, they insist they could never do it.
Week 3:
This week was super easy. I'm in between 2 cheat days that are probably a little closer together than they should be, so it makes not eating the cake that was sitting in the break room a lot easier. I've noticed that the juices I make are way better at the beginning of the week when I have a large supply of fruit to offset the palate crushing greens. The end of the week, not so much. We've had to resort to some pretty creative recipes. Today was probably a juice I would not try to recreate...ever. It was kale, spinach, carrots, a couple green apples, half a lemon, celery, and some ginger. That's pretty standard green juice stuff. Then we added a couple cloves of garlic and a full beet. What came out was a garlic-y nightmare that had the color and consistency of pig's blood. Great if you see a woman with a fur coat, or if you need to ruin a prom. Not so good if you have to drink it.
I have discovered that cantaloupe is a tasty addition to any juice, and that if a recipe calls for blending in an avocado, but you don't have a working blender...mashing the avocado and then mixing it in by hand is not a suitable alternative.
So as of tonight, I have not had any soda of any kind in 20 days. This is very surprising to anyone who knows my previous levels of Mt. Dew consumption. I have also lost a total of 19 lbs. On my cheat days, I did not gain anything, and had even lost a pound by the next time I weighed in. So I get to be lazy and drink my meals and do no exercise while losing damn near a pound a day.
Also, on a side note...
A lot of juicing people will tell you that if you juice for any extended period of time, you need to work your way back to real food. You start out with broths and then work your way up to salads and fruits and eventually back to proteins and pretty much everything else deliciously terrible for you. My wife has experienced a few of the side effects of jumping in too early on our cheat days and has vowed to never be that bad again while we're juicing. I...have not. I have had no bad effects from my cheat day shenanigans. It might be that I haven't been doing this as long as her, or because I have an iron stomach. I like to think that it is due to the long years of me ingesting things that are really nothing more than flavored preservatives packaged in sodium. I am willing to bet that after my thirty days are complete, I could eat at KFC and have no adverse reaction. I would say Taco Bell, but I haven't met anyone who doesn't have a bad reaction to that food.
Anyway, it's time for me to end for the night. I will try to keep writing as the inspiration hits me. In the mean time, don't be afraid to comment or share this with the world, or your neighbor, or the person next to you, or your cats...whoever. I'm not trying to convert anyone, if you enjoyed this, and think someone else will too, then the more the merrier.
